By Kevin Ahern
IN THE MIDDLE
My nose I’ve now
Come to embrace
It is the scenter
Of my face
— Friday, Nov. 1, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
NO ESCAPE
There are three things in life
You can’t avoid now, damn
In addition to death and taxes
There is also spam
— Saturday, Nov. 2, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
SCIENCE MARCHES ON
Even those
Who scoff at the sciences
Continue to use
Its appliances
— Tuesday, Nov. 5, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
HELPING HANDS
Midwives are wonderful
Without a doubt
Always ready
To help people out
— Wednesday, Nov. 6, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
UNHAPPY HOUR
The unhappiest hour
Of the day is here
Too late for coffee
Too early for beer
— Thursday, Nov. 7, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
WARM FUZZIES
I drink coffee in my slippers
Each morning I wake up
But I find it tastes better
Out of a cup
— Friday, Nov. 8, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
THINGS ARE PICKING UP
I went to a weight store
To find myself the right size
Twas there I realized shop lifting
Means checking out their merchandise
— Saturday, Nov. 9, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
OVER AND DONE
"It's Over, John. It's over. OVER!"
Said Jane without abatement
For John, it clearly was
An over statement
— Tuesday, Nov. 12, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
BREAKING UP WAS HARD TO DO
Divorce in the Jurassic
Was rather complex
The worst part was having
A Tyrannosaurus ex
— Wednesday, Nov. 13, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
HIGH LIGHTS
Lightning bug aspirations
Are true whether here or afar
Brightening nights by twinkling lights
Dreaming of being a star
— Thursday, Nov. 14, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
NO HIERARCHY
The files on my computer
Are jumbled and askew
The problem is they're always
On my lowerarchy of things to do
— Wednesday, Nov. 20, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
COMFY CHAIR
They said I sit around too much
It made me very sad
So I decided then and there
I'm not going to stand for that
— Thursday, Nov. 21, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
HOLE FOOD
The secret to a donut
With staying power
Is the main ingredient —
Hole wheat flour
— Friday, Nov. 22, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
OFF PUDDING
The girlfriend of the dessert maker
Has on her face a frown
She's identified the problem
He's always pudding her down
— Saturday, Nov. 23, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
SWEET BABALOO
Lucy the honeybee
Frowns all alone
Til Ricky, her beefriend
Buzzes, "Honey, I'm Home"
— Tuesday, Nov. 26, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
UNION EYES
The Clam Company workers went on strike
It was a major tussle
Each one followed the direction
"Don't move a single mussel"
— Wednesday, Nov. 27, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
SECOND HAND NEWS
In the old days, clocks had hands
Now most have digits, very strange
From this I'm left to conclude
Time has changed
— Thursday, Nov. 28, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
I'LL DRINK TO THAT
Beer drinkers like the metric system
For them, it is all right
Because a half a liter
Is a bit more than a pint