By Kevin Ahern
WHAT NOT TO END WITH
Grammatical errors
Hanging on a cliff
Preposition placement
What if? What if?
— Wednesday, July 1, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
SAD STORY
A rich man full of emptiness
Begins to cry
Owning all the happiness
His money can buy
— Thursday, July 2, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
INDEPENDENT KLAUS
When Santa’s angry
And will not mingle
Mrs. Claus says
He’s Cross Kringle
— Friday, July 3, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
DOUBLE OR NOTHING
When the woman left
Her gambling hack
He went and tried
To win her back
— Saturday, July 4, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
SHAPE OF THINGS
Bogart loved geometry
Twas one more thing he did
Each time he’d pull his textbook out
He’d say, “Here’s looking at Euclid”
— Tuesday, July 7, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
OUNCE OF PREVENTION
I’ve thought a lot about drinking
And here I’ll share my thoughts
If there’s a vaccine I’m needing
I’m ready to take my shots
— Wednesday, July 8, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
INDEBTED
Old MacDonald bought a farm
Through his bank, it’s true
It cost a lot, so now he sings
EIEIOU
— Thursday, July 9, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
LOST AND FOUND
I disappear
To find myself.
When no one can find you
You can find yourself
— Friday, July 10, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
CHIROPRACTICE
The ailing man
With a hunched back
Has a one-word plan:
Lumbarjack
— Saturday, July 11, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
THE HOARDER
She’s in a race
With Amazon Prime
To run out of space
Before she runs out of time
— Tuesday, July 14, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
THE CHICK IS IN THE ...
The Birds-by-Mail service
Has its motto on display
“Your order has been processed
We send our egrets today”
— Wednesday, July 15, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
BUFFERIN SUFFERIN'
Aspirin won’t help
Though readily available
So I’m afraid your pain
Will be unBayerable
— Thursday, July 16, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
FOOLED YOU
With the exercise app on my smartwatch
I no longer sit and bicker
I relax while it thinks I’m running
Thanks to my fitness tricker
— Friday, July 17, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
AWAY FOR THE SEASON
Nature has
A clever tactic
Storing leaves?
Autumn Attic
— Saturday, July 18, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
TIKTOK TICK TALK
For Lyme disease
I’m your doc
Come hear me speak
At my Tick Talk
— Tuesday, July 21, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
DINO MIGHT
If you fight dinosaurs
I would predict
You’ll probably get
Jurassic kicked
— Wednesday, July 22, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
THE PITS
Conducting orchestras
He was quite slick at
The kind of thing
You shake a stick at
— Thursday, July 23, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
IN PERSPECTIVE
He said she was a one in a million
And I said, “Son of a gun!”
Because on a scale zero to 10
That means she’s a 0.00001
— Friday, July 24, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
AND THEY'RE TALKING
What are these voices in my head?
Directives from the gods?
Oops, my bad.
AirPods
— Saturday, July 25, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
THYME FOR IT
When her spice supply
Was running down
Jan ran through
The fennel countdown
— Tuesday, July 28, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
HOW WOULD I KNOW?
I’ve never had any riches, so
I’ll make this short and snappy
There is no way I could ever know
If money would make me happy
— Wednesday, July 29, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
GIVE UP
Love is surrender.
Surrender is love.
To know this.
Is enough.
— Thursday, July 30, 2026
By Kevin Ahern
THE FINAL FRONTIER
Our 3D printer’s working great
The stuff it makes is prime
I hear it also does 4D
If you just give it time