By Kevin Ahern
WOODEN DO THAT
Sometimes a conundrum
Bears repeating
Like the hungry beaver
Who was knot eating
— Friday, Aug. 1, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
OFF HANDED
With regards to my favorite puppet
This is the way it stands
I put it up for sale last week
And someone took it off my hands
— Saturday, Aug. 2, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
CRYSTAL BULL
For seeing the coming economy
One visionary never fails
Nordstradamus never misses predictions
Of department store sales
— Tuesday, Aug. 5, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
SPELBOUND
Roses are read
Violets are blew
Spelling is something
I cannot dew
— Wednesday, Aug. 6, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
OBSTACLE
Meditating electricians
Need assistance
Because when they say ‘ohm’
It means resistance
— Thursday, Aug. 7, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
TEST RESULTS
A dimwit was feeling
From the results pretty nifty
His IQ was positive
And his COVID test was 50
— Friday, Aug. 8, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
UNLOOK THE DOOR
Anguish is
Without a doubt
A prisoner of life
Clamoring to be let out
— Saturday, Aug. 9, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
PAYROLL TACKS
Living in Mexico
Is swell
Except the jobs
Don’t peso well
— Tuesday, Aug. 12, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
NICK AT NITE
It’s weird they’ve never
Asked for forgiveness
Given that Gillette’s
In a cutthroat business
— Wednesday, Aug. 13, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
DEBTOR'S PRISON
Buying on time
Is most unforgiving
If you miss payments
On the cost of living
— Thursday, Aug. 14, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
UNROLLING STONES
Four men in a rock group
Won’t sing an encore
We’re not talking Beatles
It’s Mount Rushmore
— Thursday, Aug. 21, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
SPF 100
He said he’d been bathing
In the light of deep thought
But I don’t think that sunburn
Is what he got
— Friday, Aug. 22, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
SHOCKING
The electric auto economy
Is keeping the car biz humming
But has overtaken many folks
Who never heard it coming
— Saturday, Aug. 23, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
GRATING ON THE CURVE
I got a 27
They told me it’s a C
But only when converted to Fahrenheit
Did it make sense to me
— Tuesday, Aug. 26, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
CAPITAL PUNISHMENT
The grammar police solved a crime
Using an approach most passive
They told reporters the reason why
Because the case was sensitive
— Wednesday, Aug. 27, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
TRANSFUSION NEEDED
He drank so much
It would seem
He needed more blood
In his alcohol stream
— Thursday, Aug. 28, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
LOWEST FORM OF LIFE
Always ready
With an excuse or apology
Seems she’s got a degree
In alibiology
— Friday, Aug. 29, 2025
By Kevin Ahern
DOUBLE PLACEBO EFFECT
He imagined he was a doctor
But the title didn’t stick
So it was he only treated
People who imagined they’re sick