By Kevin Ahern
TOO MUCH
Lifesaving drills
On a ship get ignored
Because all too often
They go overboard
— Tuesday, Aug. 1, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
DAZE OF OUR LIVES
For Amazon’s annual Prime Day
There was something very wrong
It seemed a lot like Monday
Cuz it was 48 hours long
— Wednesday, Aug. 2, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
GENIUS
Breathing the same air as us
And having the same water and food
Paul McCartney sat down and wrote
Yesterday and Hey Jude
— Thursday, Aug. 3, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
OPEN AND SHUT
It’s purely human nature
I realize it's true
That folks are much more open
To those they are close to
— Friday, Aug. 4, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
NO WAY, MAN
A Hawaiian army
Would never attack
Because their attitude
Is lei’d back
— Saturday, Aug. 5, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
HIGH CUISINE
Maybe eating slices
Of peanut butter and jelly
Are better than magic brownies
Just look at your pot belly
— Tuesday, Aug. 8, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
THE AUDIO FILES
Book lovers all
Are known as bookworms
But does switching to audio
Make them tapeworms?
— Wednesday, Aug. 9, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
UNDER A SPE_ _
I’ve writ this verse without an “_”
And think I’ve done it we_ _
But iffins you should figure out
P_ease don’t te_ _
— Thursday, Aug. 10, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
HOLEY MOLEY
I bought a balloon down at the store
They put it in a sack
But my purchase isn’t there no more
Because it was under a tack
— Friday, Aug. 11, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
BELOVED VERSE
They asked if I could write a verse
That would be loved by everyone
I said I might, if the wording’s right
But this is not the one
— Saturday, Aug. 12, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
U.F.R.
An unidentified flying
Rhinoceros
Was reported as
A flyingsauceros
— Tuesday, Aug. 15, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
TEED OFF
The object of the game of golf
For every woman and man
Is to simply go out and play
The least amount of the game you can
— Wednesday, Aug. 16, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
GET YOUR OWN
I’ve searched it out
And just as I thought
There is no ‘we’
In chocolate
— Friday, Aug. 18, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
BRILLIANCE
When the shine emerging from you
Lights up your neighborhood
You will know for certain
You done good
— Saturday, Aug. 19, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
GERONIMO!
Pulling some strings
Is all right, I’ve found
If you’re a parachutist
On the way to the ground
— Tuesday, Aug. 22, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
WALRUS DISAPPROVAL
Walrus disapproval
Is easy - it goes thus
The walrus shakes its head and says
“Tusk, tusk, tusk”
— Wednesday, Aug. 23, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
JUST THE FACTS
Forty scholars get beat by one fact
And it doesn’t need to be a gem
On the other hand, you can't beat an idiot
With 40 of them
— Thursday, Aug. 24, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
RESCUE NEEDED
No use for my broken
Smart phone, I guess
It certainly has been
A damn cell in distress
— Friday, Aug. 25, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
WAXING POETIC
A candle loved Sir Lancelot
Right from the very first sight
But he preferred the darkness
So she went out for the knight
— Saturday, Aug. 26, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
VERY REWORDING
One modification
If you please
Smoothies oughta
Be called ‘soothmies”
— Sunday, Aug. 27, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
DEAD RECKONING
The lawyer at the will reading
Made a joke and got many stares
The problem, you see, was that he
Was putting on heirs
— Tuesday, Aug. 29, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
INCREDIBLE SHRINKING CONFERENCE
Dollars sucked eight
Out the exit door
So welcome, dear fans
To the Pac-Four
— Wednesday, Aug. 30, 2023
By Kevin Ahern
ROE YOUR BOAT
When she told me my fish pun
Really smells
I said, “Don’t blame me”
“I got it from salmon else”
— Thursday, Aug. 31, 2023