By Kevin Ahern
THE PARTY'S OVER
When the end arrived for the Italian dictator
He was eating his favorite linguine
His advisor shook his head and said,
"It's Finito, Mussolini"
— Wednesday, Dec. 4, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
PASSED TIMES
Across the archeological display
I saw my old friend Gus
But we didn't greet each other
Too much history between us
— Thursday, Dec. 5, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
ZOMBIE LIFE
Zombie kids are challenging
Sometimes rough and ready
Anchored by their parents,
Mummy and Deady
— Friday, Dec. 6, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
REINSTATING THE DRAUGHT
Sitting in a bar
It occurred to me
"Happy Hour" is a sign
Of a pour economy
— Saturday, Dec. 7, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
SOURCE OF THE PROBLEM
I blamed my friends and myself
For all of our problems for sure
But when I learned Feng Shui
I discovered it was the furniture
— Tuesday, Dec. 10, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
LUNGE FORWARD
I have started doing lunges
And it's very easy to see
That this simple kind of exercise
Is a big step forward for me
— Wednesday, Dec. 11, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
RIGHT TANGLES
Opting for an alternate universe
Has turned out most peculiar
We thought we picked one parallel
But instead it's perpendicular
— Thursday, Dec. 12, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
IN A FOREIGN LAND
Lost in his thoughts
He's in trouble galore
Never having traveled
That road before
— Friday, Dec. 13, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
UNDERAGE
The club fun started well
But there was a catch
When the guy at the door
Decided to card Blanche
— Saturday, Dec. 14, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
JUNK MALE
I've reached a new low
In my life now, damn!
A love letter I emailed
Was filtered as spam
— Tuesday, Dec. 17, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
AND HER DAZE ARE FEW
The old gray mare
Wishes she had a penny
For every time she had stopped
Cuz her whoas were many
— Wednesday, Dec. 18, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
PARADISE LOST
Dear bee in my rose garden
Fragile anthropod
Please forgive me for picking
The kingdom of your God
— Thursday, Dec. 19, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
NO SHORTCUTS
For a life complete
Do not forget
To taste the sweet
You have to sweat
— Friday, Dec. 20, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
TWO PART HARMONY
Magician assistants' efforts
Couldn't seem dafter
But in the job market
They're much sawed after
— Saturday, Dec. 21, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
COMMUNICATION BREAKDOWN
You wrote an ode in letters and gold
A beautifully worded sonnet
Then sent it to your love I'm told
Without any postage on it
— Tuesday, Dec. 24, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
ALWAYS IN JEOPARDY
Very early in life
He made odd impressions
When others looked for answers
Alex Trebek sought questions
— Wednesday, Dec. 25, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
BAD INFLUENCE
My perspective has no impact
So easy is it to see
Within all social media
How unfluential I be
— Friday, Dec. 27, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
IRONIC
The anti-gloating cream I bought
Is the most ironic product that's ever been
Because in order for it to work
You have to rub it in
— Saturday, Dec. 28, 2024
By Kevin Ahern
SNOT A BIG DEAL
So you jog a lot?
Big deal, I say
My nose goes running
Every single day